Metro now features video ads in stations, the first of which is a 15-second trailer for the upcoming Star Trek XI: The Wrath of the Franchise Reboot, silently flashed onto the Farragut West Metro entryway wall by a ceiling-mounted projector. Metro Marketing Director Mark Rydstrom says “In the words of Mr. Spock, we hope this concept will ‘live long and prosper.'”

Fitting that this first Metro video ad should be at a Farragut Square station, considering that pre-reboot Captain Kirk’s first deep space assignment was to the USS Farragut as a young lieutenant. Next on the wish list: holodeck Metrobuses. If that’s too much to ask, I’ll settle for working turbolifts escalators.

Paulo Ordoveza

Roving Asian mendicant, can occasionally be seen wandering the streets of downtown Washington, muttering unintelligible gibberish to passers-by while pushing a “bag lady” shopping cart full of old blankets, American flags, soda cans, and healthy secondhand snacks from organic food shop dumpsters. Used to live in a cardboard box at 16th and K but the rent was too expensive.