”
courtesy of ‘Alex Barth’

D.C. United
Record: 9-8-13
Place: Fourth in the East
Last Two Weeks: 1-0-1

At the end of it all, United couldn’t win when they had to, and settled for a tie in Kansas City. They tied more than they did anything else this season, which is why they’ll watch the playoffs from their homes. Needing a win in Kansas City, they managed to put up the offense, but the loss of Wicks in goal meant they gave up a pair of goals they shouldn’t have.

So, what happens now? The good news is, United is still DC’s football team that doesn’t suck. The bad news, well, Coach Tom Soehn may be done. It’s not clear if that’s all that bad.

As usual, Ben Olsen nails it: “This organization’s not used to [missing the playoffs]. If that’s the case, then we’ll handle it. You know, take part of the blame. We lost this organization some points out of this year, and we’re in this together and move forward. You can’t make it every year, but two in a row is alarming, and we’ll certainly look to coming back next year.”

‘Rock the Red’
courtesy of ‘afagen’

Capitals
Record: 6-2-2
Place: 1st in the Southeast
Last Two Weeks: 4-0-1

A good run for the Caps after a slow start means the Caps remain the only first place team in the District. However, two of those wins have been far closer to a far inferior opponent for my comfort, and I suspect the same is true for y’all, too. Needing overtime to beat the Islanders? C’mon now, that’s just not church. Of course, they needed a shootout to beat the Preds, so that may just be par for the course with the new caps.

Ovi picked up a $2,500 fine for Slew-Footing this past week, and it probably should’ve come with a one-game suspension. For those of you, like me, who wonder in the name of Ned is slew-footing, it’s where you use your skate to knock out the skate of another player. It’s dangerous and leads to injury, so it’s going to be strongly fined hereafter. This was a warning shot.

The Caps play the hated Flyers tomorrow night at 7 at the Phone Booth. They’re in Atlanta on Thursday, and then play at home against the Islanders Friday and then Columbus on Sunday. Tickets should be available for the home matches.

Redskins
Record: 2-4
Place: Last in the NFC East
Last Two Weeks: 0-1

It’s Monday night for the Skins this week, up against division rival Philadelphia, and it’ll be the first look at the Skins’ new play-caller. After surrendering his play-calling responsibilities (and nearly his job), this is a week to watch Jim Zorn. I feel he might be a dead man walking, as he’s not pleased with the loss of autonomy, but that might change if the Skins can keep it close with the Eagles. The Skins have now promised he’s here for the whole season, but why stick around when the majority of your game-day job is with someone else?

I don’t expect them to win this week, I expect another mediocre effort, ending in disappointment. Don’t look for visible signs of unrest on the TV tonight, either, as Dan Snyder has ordered the security outlets to remove all disparaging signs and paraphernalia at the gate for tonight’s game. Ah, owners. What would we do without them. But what if the Owner wasn’t really the problem? I know, I know, heresy in this time of trial, but no, I think he’s got an excellent point. Look at all the changes the Skins have made in the last six years. Look at the crazy morphology. Could any team have done well with that many constant core changes happening? Perhaps all is not lost. We shall see, but it’s going to be a long rebuild.

Wizards
Record: 4-4
Place: It’s Pre-season.
Last Two Weeks: 3-2

Well, .500 ball is a dramatic improvement over last season’s horrific effort, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves, it’s still pre-season. Antawn Jamison will miss 8-13 games with shoulder problems. But all is not black and dark. Check out Gilbert Arenas’ profile in the NY Times.